Wowza!!

It's been ages since I have looked at my Xanga...Damn you Myspace!!!

I turned 22 this last weekend AHHHHHHHH!! It was great time spent with my friends at Chaucers (sushi) .For some unexplainable reason everyone felt the need to keep buying me shots OH OH!!

Yep I got completely wasted...i believe I was completely wasted ALL weekend...Drank at the pool during the day too...

Went to the Gayborhood on Sunday night and met up with a couple of friends...my friend Steve was very nice and handed over his credit card followed by him saying drink on my tab...again OH OH!!

Wasted Again!

I felt like death Monday...So I have decided I am done with shots, no more!! Also i am going to try to cut back on drinking, OMG that is so going to be a task...

Yay the guys and I are going to Las Vegas June 1-4 WOO HOO!!

So last night was fun but I sure as hell do regret it now.

I went to S4 last night got to sleep very very late and had to wake up at 730am so I got about 3-4 hours of sleep.

Coffee to the rescue!!

I think I see the Light!

I just can't ever get to it...

Is the light really at the end of the road? Maybe I don't want to get to the light!

LIVING LIFE IN THE FAST LANE

The past week or so I have felt awkwardly weird. Much having to do with the feeling of always being on the go! Have you ever felt like you just don't get a chance to breathe? I feel like I don't get a chance to just relax. With my work and school schedule I barely have time to pay attention to myself. At this point most would think that I had gotten used to it, but as much as I want to believe I have, I HAVE NOT.

Sometimes at night I wish that I was granted one WISH. Sometimes I wish to be a kida again and have no worries to be able to run wild and not have any responsiblity. Sometimes I just wish to be able to be HAPPY. Other times I just wish to be FREE. Is this what my life is going to be albout the rest of my life? Will I always feel rushed? Will I always be confined to certain standards? Will I have to keep being another person in front of my parents b/c of the fear to be left alone in this world of "heads or tails"? Am I ever going to enjoy what life has got to offer me? 

If so then I dunno that i could handle that, I believe I am a strong person, but you can only take the punches so long. Sometime I feel lucky to be who/where I am but there are times that I feel doomed. There are so many things I want to do! Things I want to say! Unfortunately many of those things will never be said or done. I have always been a believer/dreamer, and that i believe is a great characteristic. I am the person that will go for the best, so why am I having these issues now.

I am used to being able to withold my emotions and thoughts, am i becoming a weaker person? Have i gone crazy I don't cry! Boys don't cry!! Luckily I have goals and I think that I am one in a millin many guys my age are still lost and confused testing the field many on drugs. I can say i have been there done that and no thanks! I know what I want and you better believe that I AM GOING TO GET IT...I have the drive and determination! To all who have read this MUCH LOVE we'll see where I am in 10yrs Wish me LUCK!!!!! We live in a world of choices and I am going to make the right ones!